Hey D-Bag, Can You Hear Me Now?

Posted: March 19, 2011 by divebardiva in Daily Ramblings, Viva La Douche

Okay peeps here’s the deal: Tonight is a big one…the moon is full and closer to the earth than it has been in hundreds of years…lunar cycles affect water and we are mostly H2O. The shit is gonna get crazy so I thought I would post a little something to tide ya’ll over since I am quite sure that tomorrow I will be sleeping until it’s work time.

Dear Douchy McDoucherson,

Tonight you came up to the bar during the height of the “ladies’ night” melee. I caught your eye and came over before I realized you were in the middle of a phone call. My bad.

The fact you held your finger up for me to stand there and wait while you finished your ever-so-important conversation. Your bad.

You getting pissy because I turned and waited on someone else who was clearly not otherwise engaged. Your bad.

You thinking that you could bitch about it, and I would actually care. Your bad again, dumb ass.

You thinking that I would be upset when you got my partner to wait on you. Your bad.

Me torturing you for the rest of the night by saying, “Oh , I’m sure you would rather Krista wait on you when she has time.” FUCKING PRICELESS (and something I didn’t tire of ALL night).

So thank you, Douchy, for the hours of entertainment at your expense. Sometimes being a bitch is all a girl has to hold on to.

Love and Liquor,
The divebardiva

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