A Little Hung…

Posted: March 25, 2011 by divebardiva in Q&A: Ask Your Bartender

Okay people, here’s how it’s workin today: I decided to have lunch with an old friend (who I love and is also a bartender) yesterday which included a couple of beers. And by a couple, I clearly mean six.

Then I took a little hop to BWW to see one of my favorite beautiful bartenders, Pamela, who was sadly not working. Not to be dissuaded, I met a cute little thing named Jenny and ordered some wings and more beer.

On my way home, I thought long and hard and realized I had no beer at the house. No bueno my friends, no bueno. I was chatting up my favorite liquor store ladies when one of them (who knows I love the vino) suggested I try a new blended red they had in. Well really, who was I to say no?

So, I ended my night drinking wine and eating a bevy of fine breads and cheeses while talking to my bff, one Miss Vodka Toxic, via skype. We were discussing our upcoming trip to Atlanta and our plans to live blog our adventures as they happen. As you can imagine, one glass quickly turned into three, and today my brain leaves a bit to be desired.

This brings us to today’s little project called, “Ask Your Bartender.” This is how this shit is gonna work…you ask the questions, we get you the answers. The questions need not be confined to drinking. However, “How do I cure a hangover?” is one I hear often.

You can ask us about anything, and we will do our level best to find you the damn answers. No question is too stupid or embarassing, although we do reserve the right to mock your ass for entertainment purposes.

So get off your asses and bring that shit on!

  1. Jeffrey says:

    Where Should Edward, Ross and I go drinking tonight?

  2. divebardiva says:

    Ross has a great divey place by his house called Aces. That would be my professional suggestion.

  3. DJ SEXXX JELLAY says:

    DJ SJ wants to know:

    How do you tell a skank that she’s a skank (and a chickenhead) with out calling her a skank (or a chickenhead)?

    If not the Big Bang Theory or Intelligent Design, then what?

    Proper way to place toilet paper; over or under?

    Better Darrin: Dick Seargent or Dick York? Why?

  4. DJ SEXXX JELLAY says:

    Those really were the first four questions that popped into my head.

    • divebardiva says:

      Dear DJ SJ,

      Answer #1 Please stop humping my leg.
      Answer #2 Aliens.
      Answer #3 Over…always over.
      Answer #4 I liked them both but Dick Sargent was cuter and had better facial expressions.

  5. BigWillyWhiskySlinger says:

    I would not usually comment on a post that starts as “A Little Hung…” But who who cares.
    Not so much a question but a bit of advice.
    There is probably no more annoying thing for a bartender than someone who complains about the strength of their drink…so if you want a drink that is a little stronger but don’t want a “true” double…may I suggest.
    #1 TIP VERY WELL!!!…this can’t be overstated.
    #2 Be Nice…that’s it…just be nice.
    #3 Be FUNNY….My All-Time favorite was when I had a girl come up to the “open” (free) bar at the wedding I was working…put a $5 spot on the bar and said “Can I get a Captain Coke??? and “Pour it like you are at the cabin.”…..Priceless….Nuff Said.


  6. 5 dog fabulous says:

    I would like to take this moment to mock the dumbass who asked me a question last week.
    Me: “What can I get ya.”
    DA: “I need a bottle of Capt.” (off sale liquor)
    Me: “Ok here it is that will be 17.85.”
    DA: “Hey, what’s a drink that will make someone puke?”
    Me: “Excuse me what?”
    DA: “My friend has never puked from drinking what can I make for him that will make him puke.”
    Me: “Do you want this Captain or what?”
    DA: “Yeah, but I want to know what will make him puke.”
    Me: “Listen, we need to complete this transaction first. DO YOU WANT THIS CAPTAIN OR WHAT?”
    DA: “Yes here is my money”
    Me: “As far as your friend goes if he really wants to puke tell him to stick his fingers down his throat!”
    There are some questions you should never ask your bartender!! That was one of them…….Dumbass.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s